“With this in mind, we constantly pray that our God will empower you to live worthy of all that he has invited you to experience. And we pray that by his power all the pleasures of goodness and all the works inspired by faith would fill you completely. By doing this the name of Jesus will be glorified in you, and you will be glorified in him, by the marvelous grace of our God and the Lord Jesus Christ.”

2 Thessalonians 1:11-12 TPT

Learning to say no is one of the most powerful things we can do for a healthy and productive life. It can also be one of the most painful. No is usually associated with a negative, such as in response to discipline, rejection, or a rule of some sort. As it can be hard to receive, it can be even harder to express. But no can also have a positive effect.

When Paul is instructing Titus (Titus 2:11-14 paraphrased), he reminds him that “the grace of God that offers salvation has appeared and it teaches us to say “NO” to ungodliness and worldly possessions, and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives while we wait for the blessed hope – Jesus Christ – who gave himself for us to redeem us from all wickedness and to purify for himself a people that are his very own, eager to do what is good.”

So, God invites us to experience all the pleasures of goodness that will fill us completely with abundant life. But to receive these fully, we must embrace the idea of saying no. It takes courage and practice to begin saying no, but when used properly, it releases the blessings of yes. And once the yeses are revealed, we can begin to experience all the goodness that God has in store for us.

So how do we begin? And where do we start? We all have our battles that keep us from fully experiencing our faith – but here are a few victories (in progress) that I’ve experienced. I’m sure some of you can relate 😉 at least to a few.

Saying No to fear says yes to faith. When you face your challenges knowing Who walks beside you, it puts God in control rather than our fear. (Joshua 1:9)

Saying No to being offended says yes to relationship. It is a choice to be offended by other people’s actions, words, or opinions. But when we say no to offense, we are free from resentment and free to forgive. Saying no to offense, frees us to show the love of Jesus, even to those we perceive as our enemies. (Luke 6:27-33)

Saying No to non-essential responsibilities says yes to rest and reflection. Rest opens the door for refreshment of mind, Spirit, body, and soul. Rest also allows others the opportunity to use their gifts and to be a blessing in your absence. As Paul reminds us in 1 Corinthians 10:23, “everything is permissible, but not everything is beneficial.” So, we must realize that not every opportunity has to have our name on it. Not all things that are good, are best for us. Sometimes it’s best to rest so you can evaluate which demands are necessary and helpful and which ones are dispensable. Rest and reflection will often bring greater and more fruitful opportunities to light.

Saying No to unreasonable expectations says yes to God’s will. Good healthy boundaries are sometimes perceived as selfishness. But we set ourselves up for burnout and resentment when we live our life through the lens of what others expect of us. As it is good to keep our word and do good things, when we do good things simply to make others happy, we are probably not living within the will of God’s expectations. He is the only one we need to please, and when we set our boundaries based on His promptings, we are more likely to be effective and flourish in what we do. (Galatians 1:10)

Saying No to temptation says yes to trust. Temptation is all around us. Every. Single. Day. The temptation to say that bad word, get revenge, give in to the addiction, gossip, or just to get one more scoop of ice cream, is never ending. Whatever the temptation is, it is something that will steal your peace and shake your confidence. But when you surrender your weakness to God, He will provide a way out that is pleasing to Him and usually will make you feel a lot better than giving in to your own desires. (I Corinthians 10:13)

Saying No to compromise says yes to God’s promises. Accommodating what we know is not right by compromising what we know is right depreciates our values and beliefs and can lead to further and more serious compromise. When you do it once, it gets easier and easier to do it again. But our commitment to holiness and living according to God’s uncompromised Word, will keep us from wandering and fill us with hope, joy, peace, wisdom, and strength. (Hebrews 10:23,26)

Saying no to trash says yes to truth. With so many forms of entertainment at our fingertips, it is easy to get distracted by vulgarity, pornography, conspiracy theories, speculation, and other forms of misinformation that draw us away from God. But our greatest source of wisdom, comfort, joy, and peace can be found in the Bible. Even if you don’t yet have a relationship with the Lord, the Truth found in His Word will lift your mood, and show you ways to approach life with integrity, purity, wisdom, and love for others. Consuming the pages of the Bible will direct you to the way that is good and honorable and true. (Philippians 4:8)

Most importantly, saying No to the power we give sin says yes to the power of salvation. As we go through the motions of Holy Week, let’s also go through the notions of why we celebrate and remember. The most impactful nos of history was when Jesus said no to life and no to death. His death on the cross says yes to forgiveness and redemption. His resurrection from the grave says yes to sanctification and salvation. So this week as you can, think about what no’s you need to stand firm on so you can say yes to the abundant and fruitful life that Jesus has to offer. He says, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me” (John 14:6). But this comes at a cost – the cost of saying no to who we are and saying yes to who we would rather be.

Lord God, we thank you for your great mercy and your precious gift of grace. Give us the courage to say no to things that are not from you so that we can experience the goodness of yes. Thank you for the power that you give us when we surrender our ways to your ways and grant us the fruit from your Spirit as we continually grow in wisdom and understanding. Your love is so great! We worship you and praise you and love you! May you be glorified through our actions, our words, and our deeds. Amen.